My Strange love for Ornamental stuff

From the time of school days itself, i was little craze about ornamental stuff like rings, bracelets, chains etc but it was not vivid and so peculiar like now coz of the lack of availability or the interest and time we spent for getting stuff like that. It was during the college days, the most beautiful time in everyone's life; the time when dreams begin to flourish and everyone will be so cautious of their appearance, and me too who was no different became so much addictive of all these stuff.

When come to matter of wearing all these, my first taste always goes for bracelet and coz of that whenever i am about to buy a new bracelet, i spend the maximum time in deciding which one should i buy, though i hardly visit more than three shops for buying it. I select the one only, when i am fully satisfied with its variety and the appeal it gives while wearing it. And coz of that, I was a frequent visitor of a shop named Fashion House which was located in town at that time, having a great collection of fancy ornaments. Now a days it is not at all a problem as we can get stuffs like this from almost any fancy shops. The habit of wearing bracelets and that too even on both hands have always invited trouble from seniors as a part of ragging, when i was doing my 1st year in college. Still it had never diminish the love i have for it and i used to be the same like always.

Among them there is a special one, which have been with me for quite a while; its a stainless steel bangle/bracelet  bought years back when i joined my engineering studies, to be precise in 2001. From the day i purchased to till today, it have been my so favorite piece that i always wore it in my hand and i never have to remove it, unless any of my friends  wish to have a closer look at it by trying it in their own hand itself. Being stainless steel and having unique mold thickness this bracelet is so rigid and i feel very comfort while wearing it; a kinda strong feeling. But unfortunately it is currently unavailable in market and the one we can get now is little slim than this and of no interest to me. Actually i had one more piece of the same bracelet earlier, but it was once borrowed by one of my friend and was never returned. It was told by him that he lost it in a party and apologized for it. I was not sad that time, but now i really wish like i should not have let him loose my stuff like this, since the one i am wearing now has became my favorite piece and so it would have been really nice, if i had that lost piece of the pair too. By wearing this for more than 9 years i have even developed a lot of sentimental attachments over it which may feels strange.


It was on a birthday 4 years back that my sister gifted me a golden bracelet. I was really happy to receive it, but the condition she put forward was that to remove my favorite one and then wear this golden bracelet. She was concerned about the wear that can occur if the golden bracelet was worn along with the stainless steel one. But for me it was purely unacceptable as the favorite one was like my companion itself. But she too was not willing to allow me wearing together. To avoid further issue, i returned the golden bracelet to her and told i will get it from her to wear on any special occasion only following her condition; though it never happened as i purposely avoided as i cant let go of my favorite one. After a period of more than an year or so, my sister too realized how much i am attached to my favorite bracelet and so i am never gonna wear the golden bracelet she gifted me , if the situation continues. So she gave the golden bracelet back to me and asked me to wear it according to my wish.

From then i have been wearing this together ie Stainless steel and golden bracelet. When ever i purchase new bracelet too in time, i used to wear it along with my favorite one.I didnt care for the wear it may cause to the golden bracelet, coz for a matter of fact i am more concern about my favourite bracelet only....



The one which have been with me all these years as a silent companion....
The one which has been with me in my good and bad times....
The one who has seen the pain i have come through all these years....
The one who has also stayed for a while in the hand of my lost love....

I cry more at night than sleep....

Years back, me too was like any other normal person....living tension free....enjoying every funny moment of life....hoping for a bright future....and above all that, thanking god for the most precious gift he has given me, my Love and the dreams of having a life with her and everything like that...i used to dream....i used to live in it....with small small hopes....small small fights.... without knowing my life was gonna shattered in to pieces after sometime....

Its been years since i have even slept well. Every night starts with thoughts of her more closely than in a day and the sweet memories of the moments we have spent together, right from the very instant i saw her for the first time, up to the painful moment she parted away from my life....

those seven years which makes the most beautiful moments in my life....

those sweet memories on which i am still living....

Those memories fills me with her nearness and i have a feeling like talking with her, sharing every happenings of the day....

every fun i came across and want to tell her....

every new stuff i saw and wished to buy for her....

every new places i visited, were i wished to have her too as my company....

every long rides i take, on which i missed her closeness....

every good news for which i wish, she should be the first person to hear from me and

every sad situations i had to face in which, i really longed for her to be by my side as support forever....

But when i am back from thoughts, i realize that i am all alone, in a closed room with my love no longer near me....and everything seems to fade away before my eyes....and a feeling of vacuum pierce my heart....with deep pain inside i close my eyes....failing to stop the tears flowing down my cheek....and i become more and more weak....slowly loosing my energy....i feel like dying....and i really wish like i die....

With closed eyes and paining neck coz of crying hard ,i wholeheartedly wish her to be around me, and console me with her presence and makes me feel that she is always with me....coz i know she too cant see me crying....

Missing her very badly....

In every moment of my life....

And sure the night would have gone and i forget to sleep like always....

PS: Only a few friends know about my state of mind and what i am going through now and how every single night of my life are getting equipped that, they may even misunderstand me for not responding to them if ever they happen to contact me or wish to have message/chat with me that time....still i wish to be alone only....in thoughts of her in my own world....

Its really nice to see a familiar face after years...

There may be a lot of persons whom we meet,  in our day to day life. Some of them may be related to us, in just a small part of our life and goes on, while some remain in our life forever. But the large portion ie the people who may be present in our life only for a short period, which includes persons of every stage of life we meet daily, especially in our childhood days or schools days can really influence the feelings we have for them.

                              Today, when i was returning from office, i reminded myself not to forget, to get food parceled for my doggie, since i dont want him to skip food just coz there was no meat. Though he used to adjust to do so with out meat, his sad face shows his feelings, which make me also sad. So i try to avoid that situation all the time by buying it in prior. When i was waiting to get the parcel, a person who was so familiar to me just enter the hotel and ordered for a parcel.  Back in to my school days it was none other than a person who has been working in my school, Murukettan. This 6'5" person has been a hero for among the students coz of the height he possessed.

    His sight drag me to the memories of school days.... the pleasant time of my life like everyone....When i am back from thoughts, i called by his name, Murukettan and introduced myself to him. He was really happy to talk with me and apologized that he couldn't recognize me at first. I consoled him that i have been studying right from 1st std to tenth std and i will be so small and it has been years back that, he could never recollect my face. I inquired about the instructors who have taught me, and how many of them are now in school and he was really happy to share all those information with me. He couldn't stop laughing when i added that he were the only highest person that time in school and he was our hero since we students were all small that time. The more he talked about school the more happy i was, cherishing my memories.

                                   After having a little more chit chat about the current happenings in school, just before leaving  he invited me whole heartedly to school and i am really happy to hear it.... felt it really as a  true welcome....and i am thinking of  visiting my school one day....

To cherish all those sweet memories again....