Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Somedays i wish to be connected, Somedays i wish to be isolated
We wish everyday to be different , more exciting than the previous one and for sure, former will be, but not the latter....and sometimes it can be the opposite way....leaving us in a very confused and restless state.
The people around me recognize me as a person who wish to share each and every moment of life, making it more excited and filled with fun. Because of this and an addictive of Internet, i make myself online all the time from PC when i am at home and when i am outside, used to do the same from my smartphone. In times my friends also used to make fun of me doing so and my craze of social networking and other cyber fundas. One of my friend even told like my life is really an open book by the way i used to update all my happenings even hourly in Facebook and my views in Twitter and even my depth feelings as a whole in my blog. But only a few know that i am not doing this as a hobby or passion even though i say like that; but i am keeping myself engaged and free from the thoughts which used to confuse and take my energy away.
But there are days when i fail to do so and i will be completely down and i used to keep away from all this for the time being, even the phone calls and messaging; though i know it doesn't change anything, still that isolation makes me feel comfortable and i am allowed to remain in my world of empty thoughts....with a unique feeling of satisfaction....and most time i will be unaware of how long i will be remaining like that. But one thing for sure even when i am back to all these routine, i wont be feeling any energy that day to interact with others and ie why i am just blogging now. Though days of these kind take my mood as a whole and leaves me depressed, still i am loving it; a fact that i am accepting my loneliness wholeheartedly now....
PS: Among these kind of days, there are times when i used to take a lonely ride in my bike for long distance with no specific destination. The longer i take the ride the more fresh and comfort i feel, which makes me feel strongly that nature really has its own way of healing mind and soul and i am really thankful to god for it.